Jellyfish Lake in Palau. Apparently the jellies have lost their ability to sting because of lack of predators in the lake and you can swim with them!
WAIT BUT THAT’S NOT EVEN THE COOLEST PART: These jellyfish carry small populations of algae inside their bodies and derive much of their nutrition from the sugars that the algae produce. The jellyfish follow the sun across the lake each day and rotate continuously, so that the algae are always getting maximum sunlight exposure for photosynthesis. Then at night they dive to deeper parts of the lake so the algae can absorb nitrogen. It’s one of the best examples of endosymbiosis in action and it’s KICKASS.
FLOATY FRIEND CABBAGES
anonymously tell me your credit card number ill reply with what i bought
Damn son our uterus stretches like 5x the size and then contracts and pushes a 7 pound baby out of a small tube into life if you think that isn’t metal as fuck get out of my face
YOUR ORGANS THOUGH IM SO SORRY LADIES
damn selfish babies taking up all the space
NAW MAN, LET ME FUCKING TELL YOU ABOUT PREGNANCY AND BABIES, ALRIGHT?
FIRST OF ALL, IT SUCKS DICK. FIRST OFF LET ME GIVE YOU A MOTHERFUCKING RUNDOWN ON WHAT YOU SHOULDN’T EAT OR DRINK WHEN YOU’RE PREGNANT.
- NO UNCOOKED ANYTHING IN FUCKING GENERAL ACTUALLY. AND ESPECIALLY NOT FISH.
- ANYTHING WITH CAFFEINE IN IT, WHICH INCLUDES COFFEE, SODA, CHOCOLATE (THAT’S RIGHT, NO CHOCOLATE), SEVERAL TYPES OF COOKIES AND CANDIES, AND ENERGY DRINKS.
- VEGETABLES AND MEATS THAT ARE RICH IN NITRATES LIKE HOTDOGS, SAUSAGE, LETTUCE, SPINACH AND CELERY.
SO BASICALLY IF YOU’RE USED TO EATING OR DRINKING ANY OF THOSE THINGS YOU BETTER BE PREPARED TO QUIT COLD TURKEY THE SECOND YOU GET PREGNANT.
NOW I’M NOT EVEN DONE. YOU SEE THAT PINK UPSIDE-DOWN TRIANGLE BELOW THE BABY’S HEAD? YEAH? THAT’S YOUR BLADDER. BABIES SQUEEZE DOWN ON THAT LIKE THERE’S NO TOMORROW AND ONCE YOU HIT THE THIRD TRIMESTER, YOU BASICALLY HAVE AN ELDERLY PERSON’S BLADDER. MY MOTHER TELLS ME SHE HAD TO GO TO THE BATHROOM AT LEAST 6 TIMES A DAY JUST SO SHE WOULDN’T WET HERSELF. ALSO WITH A BABY SQUEEZING’ UP AGAINST YOUR FUCKING INTESTINES LIKE THAT SAY HELLO TO CONSTIPATION NATION, EVERYONE.
SO NOT ONLY DO YOU HAVE THE BLADDER AND BOWELS OF AN OLD PERSON, BUT THAT GROWING HUMAN BEING GROWING OUT OF YOUR GULLET ALSO PUTS A HUUUUGE STRAIN ON YOUR BACK. NOT TO MENTION IT’S A PAIN IN THE FUCKING ASS TO MOVE ANYWHERE, SINCE YOU NEED TO START WALKING LIKE SOMEONE OUT OF A MONTY PYTHON SKIT JUST TO GET AROUND EFFICIENTLY. ALSO THAT ADDED WEIGHT MAKES YOUR FEET ACHE SOMETHING AWFUL. SO WHAT CAN YOU DO?
WELL GUESS WHAT. YOU CAN’T TAKE ASPRIN. ABSOLUTELY NO ASPRIN. NO IBUPROFEN, NO NAPROXEN NO NOTHING.
SO NOT ONLY ARE YOU IN PROBABLY THE MOST UNCOMFORTABLE YOU WILL EVER BE, BUT YOUR MEDICINE CHOICES ARE EXTREMELY FUCKING LIMITED. (AND NO, I MENTIONED NO CHOCOLATE EITHER.)
DO YOU GUYS NOT REALIZE THAT THE FATE OF SOCIETY AND THE HUMAN RACE IN GENERAL IS BASED ON THE FACT THAT WOMEN MOSTLY CHOOSE TO GET PREGNANT? FOR LITTLE TO NO REWARD?! THE UNITED STATES ONLY GIVES 12 UNPAID WEEKS OF MATERNITY LEAVE ON AVERAGE.
YOU WOULD THINK THAT THE FUCKING PROCESS BY WHICH OUR POPULATION CONTINUES TO GROW WOULD BE FUCKING REWARDED AND CELEBRATED, NOT SWEPT UNDER THE FUCKING RUG LIKE A PIECE OF FUCKING DUST.
Greatest rant ever.
12 weeks?! What the hell? In Canada it’s a YEAR, because a mother is kind of instrumental in a babies growth and development.. woman are seriously expected to leave their three month old baby with someone else so they don’t lose their job. That’s so shitty.
And I didn’t know about most of the othet things above. Women in general put with so much shit.
And in canada it’s not just mat leave it can be pat(ernal) leave to, so the mother and father can trade off part way through so the mother can go back after say 6 months and the father can be off for the final six.
SHE SAID IT.
|—||Usually said by someone who is about to make a valid point while simultaneously asking you a rhetorical question (via guy)|